Questions We Are Asked
by Dr. Mary Kay Clark
Director, Seton Home Study School
How can I encourage my husband to be involved in the home schooling in some way?
This is a situation which you need to pray about. Some husbands don’t want to be involved directly in the home schooling, but will agree to help indirectly by building bookcases, taking the children out on a field trip, or going grocery shopping. Other husbands will help by reading a science chapter on Sunday afternoon, or taking the children to the library on Saturday afternoon. Ask St. Joseph to help you and your husband to work out how he can help in some way.
Consider taking your husband to a home schooling conference where he can meet other parents—husbands and wives who are interested in home schooling. Perhaps he might meet some husbands who teach one subject, or attend a talk which encourages husbands to be involved. Consider having books or magazines available which promote home schooling, especially those written by fathers. If you have a support group, encourage your group to have a meeting with a home schooling father as a speaker.
There may be occasions when you might ask for your husband’s help with a particular lesson, such a science project, or new math concept, sentence diagramming, or whatever your husband is particularly skilled at or interested in. If you are having trouble with a subject, ask your student to ask his dad to help. There is great satisfaction in helping your own children learn something. Your husband may become more interested after being asked by his own son or daughter.
As you try all these things, continue to pray and pray and pray.
My husband has been put on reduced hours and reduced pay. Have you some ideas for how we can keep up our home schooling?
The prayers of the innocent children are vital!
Though it is difficult for your husband to work fewer hours, some parents who are suddenly having reduced hours appreciate spending more time with their children. Ask your husband to help out with teaching one or two subjects; he just might like it.
It is cliché, but it is true that crises are also opportunities. This is a time of difficulty, but also a time of adventure and change. Perhaps this is a good time for you and your husband to examine your lives and see if you want to make alterations. This might mean pursuing a new line of work that has always been a dream in the back of someone’s mind. Or, it could mean moving your family to a new and unfamiliar location where there are more jobs available. John Paul the Great always exhorted his listeners to trust in God and “move out into the deep,” just as St. Peter stepped out of the boat and toward Jesus on the stormy seas.
While it is difficult to start over in a different field or in a different location, this is one country where at least we have some opportunities, which many countries lack.
My children are moving along pretty well, and each has a subject which seems especially easy. Should I move them up now, in just one subject, or should I just wait until next year?
There are several factors to consider, relating to the subject itself as well as the student’s needs. For instance, if the subject is math, you need seriously to consider moving your student to the next level. There are only so many addition and subtraction problems a student can stand if he already has learned the process. If, for some reason, you don’t think your student is ready to move up, you might try using a different book but covering the same material, especially for word problems, which are difficult for many students.
Your child might be able to move on to the next grade level in spelling, but decide whether this time period might be better spent doing additional work in another subject area. For instance, your child may need more time for reading or writing book reports or doing his English workbook. In this case, let him wait until next year for the next grade level for spelling, and give him the time he needs to improve in an area where he needs extra help now.
I never did move my boys up a grade level because I have believed in enrichment activities at the same level. For instance, we would read library books about things we discovered in the textbooks, such as science projects, or picture books showing places around the world, or biographies of historical figures we studied.
An advantage of enrichment at the grade level is that the student will not be struggling with concepts that may be too advanced, but will be learning more about the topics at grade level. Most important, be sure to pray about making the right decision.
My boy reads well enough in fifth grade, but I don’t think he comprehends enough of what he is reading.
It seems your son knows how to read (he knows his phonics), but for some reason he is not internalizing the ideas he is reading.
There are several possible reasons. One is that he may not be interested in what he is reading. Have you gone to the library with him and searched the shelves with him? Have you pointed out the books in the children’s department that are non-fiction, such as the history books, the science books, the biographies, the geography books, even the encyclopedias? Take a good amount of time, perhaps an hour with just you and him going through the book shelves and pulling off different books and talking about them a little. Throughout this exercise, try to determine if the problem is really comprehension or merely lack of concentration.
If you find nothing interesting in the children’s section, see if the library has a young adult section, which is really for teens. Go through the shelves in the same way. It is possible his interests are more advanced than what he is “reading” and he is bored. It is likely you will find an area of interest in one of these two sections, but if not, then go to the adult non-fiction section. You may find a more mature mind than you anticipated. (You should look over any books your child selects to be sure they are appropriate.)
However, if after all this, he is not interested in any books in the library and still seems not to comprehend what he is reading, there may be a reading comprehension problem. In this case, you may want to contact our Special Services department. You can phone or email the department and set up an appointment to talk with them, and they should be able to give you some teaching ideas or advise further testing to determine just what might be the problem.
Most of all, pray to your son’s guardian angel and to his patron saint. They both will surely help him to learn to comprehend what he is reading.
I am a single mom and must work, but I want to home school my young daughter. How can I find someone to help me?
We receive a number of calls like yours. The main priority is to pray to find someone to help you. A relative would be best. Have you thought about an older woman as a nanny and tutor? Might there be a single woman at church who is out of work and may be happy to have food and board in exchange for helping you home school?
Try to find a local Catholic home schooling support group, and attend a few of their meetings, and make some friends there. Tell some of the moms that you need help, that perhaps one or two of them might help by taking your daughter along with their children. They may know of someone, such as a retired teacher, who may be willing to help. Just keep looking and praying!
However, remember that you must be in charge, you must direct the learning, and you must do whatever review or whatever else you can with your daughter. Other home schooling moms are busy with their own children, so you cannot expect them to do everything.
Try to work your hours in the afternoon and evening so you can be home with your daughter in the morning when you both are at your “brightest.” You might ask your company if it would be possible to telecommute a couple of days a week. Consider using the work-free weekends as your best “schooling” days. If you cannot sufficiently cover all the necessary core subjects during the regular school calendar, then you may need to home school all year, doing perhaps three or four days a week.
If you can work this out, focus on the primary subjects of religion, math, English, reading, and phonics. History and science can be done in a more casual manner, such as reading history before going to sleep or discussing science over Sunday dinner. Spelling and handwriting can be combined, shortening the lessons to two or three days a week.
I want to continue going to daily Mass, but my husband is concerned about the price of gas, and we need the money for food which is becoming more expensive.
Hopefully you can obtain EWTN, either on television or on radio. Mass is on every day, twice a day. You and your family can make spiritual communions. There are other good EWTN programs that will help you and your family, some especially for children. Consider asking the children’s grandparents, or perhaps some other relatives, to help out financially so you can afford to have the EWTN television station.
As the economic times become more difficult, older relatives and single relatives will be helping more families with children. Perhaps having older relatives move into your home can be helpful for them and for you. In difficult times, we all must be willing to make some sacrifices.
On the other hand, we do have to ask ourselves, for what goals are we willing to sacrifice? In times past, Catholics risked not merely their money, but also their lives, by attending Mass.
My oldest is just starting 9th grade, but it reminds me that I need to be thinking ahead about preparing my children for college with the best high school courses for them, especially to attain scholarships.
Seton has two counselors who can help you. Bob Wiesner is the Seton Guidance Counselor who is very aware of the college requirements, especially for Catholic colleges. He can be reached directly at (540) 636-2238. Gene McGuirk, a home schooling father who has had two children graduate from college, is our high school counselor. He can be reached directly at (540) 635-4728. They will be happy to discuss with you the courses your children need as well as the importance of the scores on the ACT and SAT tests.
